Soap Box Saturday: May 27 - 31, 2013

General Hospital

I was fully ready for the revelation that Roger Howarth's character is...Franco. I said from the beginning when it was clearly leaning this way that it was a major "jump-the-shark" moment. Well whatever the soap opera equivalent of jump-the-shark is. And I still stand by that. I thought I would be done with the show or at least that story line, but since it is the only soap I really watch (hard to call AMC & OLTL soaps at this point), I wouldn't have fodder for a Saturday post.

I never watched the original Franco stories for a reason...I do not like James Franco as an actor or awards show host. I found the story to be so ridiculous it didn't merit my time. I know the gist of what happened and so it seemed completely implausible to recast this established character with Roger Howarth. Now I am not so sure. I sort of found him a bit endearing. A bit...

There are some things I don't understand. First, Kristen Alderson & Chad Duell who play Kiki & Michael had such a huge fan following when she played Starr. With her being Kiki, she is supposedly Franco's daughter and Franco is Jason Quartermaine's twin brother, which makes him AJ's half brother and AJ is Michael's biological father, so if Michael & Kiki were to hook up, that would just skeeve everyone out. Kissing cousins is going to far, even for a soap opera that had an entire city frozen.

I will give Franco a chance. For a yet to be determined time frame.

I am so happy that the Lulu has amnesia story is over because I sort of wanted to whack her on the head just to get her to shut up. Although we still don't really have a reason why she got amnesia in the first place. I guess we are to assume it is because she was frozen, but...who really knows.

They really opened the whole Michael being raped while in prison story bandage off. I felt as though the writers had some sort of challenge as to how many times they could insert the word "rape" into the episodes. If they didn't make it, then the bar was set high.

And one last note. Could AJ be any dumber? He could play both roles in Dumb & Dumber. Amazing how everything has to be spelled out for him. It begs the question, what the hell was he doing while exiled and presumed dead? Obviously it was not watching television or reading or having a clue about anything in general. God help ELQ if he wins the battle.

All My Children & One Life To Live

Yes, I am combining both because together they add up to two hours per week. And neither are quality hours.

I have no clue why you would spend half of an episode of a show that only airs for a half an hour twice per week on a poker game. I don't think OLTL knows either, but they did. And then because it seems to be the thing to do, they paraded out Snoop Dog. I know, I know it is Snoop Lion now, but I don't understand that and he was Snoop Dog back in the day. It is just like when Prince was a symbol, he was still Prince. I have to wonder how or why Snoop would ever have landed in Llanview to begin with to become cozy with Bo Buchanan, who I am fairly certain has never listened to Gin & Juice.

But I digress...I really dislike Jerry ver Dorn as Clint. Sorry, but Clint Richie is and will always be Clint in my book. And that whole passing comment that Tea got him off house arrest...what? He murdered someone? Gah!

Can we please put clothes on these kids err...adults and get them some sort of life other than being catfished (you know that is where this is going) and walking around the house in underwear. This new found freedom that the shows have with relation to language, story subjects and lack of clothing, it downgrades the show even more than it is by having hack writers and limited airing.

Over on AMC, things seem pretty stagnant. They might have a lead on finding Cassandra no thanks to the craptacular FBI agent Lea. I am thinking that Pine Valley is sort of like manning a ranger tower in Alaska as far as assignments go. Really hope they wrap that up soon because if I have to hear Cass whine & cry much more, I will stab myself in the ears.

Thorsten Kaye got to the writers and had them write in a passing conversation about the Detroit Red Wings. Quite funny that it came right as they were eliminated from the Playoffs, but then I am a Penguins fan and we are hard wired to hate the Red Wings.

Am I the only one thinking that Celia's guardian is going to be Dmitri Marick? Also, am I the only one who wishes she had been sent to a different all girls school just so we wouldn't have to watch the syrup that is her and Pete(y)?

I admit, I didn't bother to watch AMC or OLTL daily. I watched five episodes all on Friday and then I only half watched as I worked on other things. I cannot bring myself to watch the "More" episodes because the host is most likely a passed-over for soaps actress and that is not a good thing.

I thought there was supposed to be a lot of drama and suspense during May sweeps. Something to keep me tuned in. But there was nothing. The lead up to the revelation of Franco was a joke. The clues were as obvious as a MENSA member watching Blues Clues.

I am thinking I may have to turn to Young & the Restless & cut AMC & OLTL out. That is if Prospect Park doesn't cut them loose for me.

Did you watch any soap operas this week? What are your thoughts? Any out there that I am missing?


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